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First Place
The Passionate Dairy Vet To His Cows
by Ben Werkhoven
Come stand by me and warm my arm
And we shall make thy ovary charm.
Prove to farmer, herd, and friends
Pregnancy is not an end.
No fair maiden, milker sweet
More than arms and rectums meet.
We are paired for so much more.
Of us they will write dairy lore.
I will bed thee, feed thee too
Milk thee, lead thee. I am true.
Build thee barns to thy delight
And savor your lowing in the night.
No average pair will we be
Larks will proclaim us from the tree.
Though fame be not our goal nor dream
Our partnership will surely ring.
So come with me and be my pride
Through the barns and parlors stride
With good health and milk for all
Fully fed with clean freestall.
I promise thee all I can
My heart, smarts, money, land.
So if it please thee to join me now,
Come with me and be my cow.
The Cow’s Reply To the Veterinarian by
Ben Werkhoven
If truly spoke the vet to me
Of pastures, barns, and jubilee.
Beyond the grass that thy’d allow
I’d follow thee and be thy cow.
Yea, if only life was so
And streams would laugh and fields would grow.
Time plods on though, down the path
Where many more have gone in times past.
Pastures fade and sheds crumble
Loud fame now will become a mumble.
Promises of glory hide within
Sure loss of hope and feelings grim.
Thy feed, thy stalls, thy barns of lore
Thy clover sweet and paddocks galore.
Soon rot, soon break, soon tumble down—
Foolish thoughts without ground.
Thy promises of fortune, fame
Palpation dreams and milky claims
All these in me no milk is charmed
To come with thee and warm thy arm.
Could summer last and pastures flush
Had life no rain, no fields to crush
Then promises of veterinary care and prow
Might move me so to be thy cow.
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Second Place
The Life of a Cow
by Rachel Record
When I took my first breath, it was twenty below,
Struggling to stand in the mud and the snow.
I can’t feel my right ear or the tip of my tail,
but I’m lucky enough to be born a female.
They gathered us up with horses and ropes;
Tackling steers and cutting their hopes.
As I choke on the dust, there’s a sting in my side;
I bear tags in my ears, and a mark on my hide.
The grass had turned yellow, all crunchy and dry;
Not a care in the world, I swish at a fly.
Over North billows dust, such an ominous sign;
When they split me from mom, then the bawlin’s all mine.
Winter, again, with the snow all swirled ‘round;
Once more in a gath’ring, now making no sound.
As I squeeze through the hole, I am caught by my head;
One more pinch, not a tag, a tattoo in its stead.
We stood in two groups, like kids at a dance;
Each lady in waiting for a bull to advance.
What’s to happen I think, as ones sniffs at the air;
With five gals to one guy, it’s still plenty to share.
Sun glistened on ice, but we could still get to feed;
So I eat and I eat and grow heavy indeed.
But my belly is strange, something’s swimming around;
With a push and a shove, that thing falls to the ground.
So I peeked ‘round my rear to see what I’d find,
There lies a small creature with legs intertwined.
It’s all wet and it smells, so I give it a lick;
Then it jumps to its feet, with a buck and a kick.
‘Bout the time the winds changed and leaves started to fall,
I grow tired of meeting his every need and each call.
Cowboys come down the hill, with their broncs at a run;
This is likely the last I will see of my son.
Time tumbles across the prairie and sun,
With calves raised and sold, now my turn had come.
Life was tough at its worst, but I’m glad in this tale;
I was lucky enough to be born a female.
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Third Place
Chili Dog
by Janet Van Nuland
My good ole dog liked chili
But he didn’t like it cold
Now we’re not talkin’ weather here
We’re talkin’ meat that’s bold
I’d bring it to him pippin hot
On a real cold day in March
His nostrils would flare up wide
And his back produced an arch
I’d say “watch out now buddy
There’s hot sauce in that mix”
Bud he’d just squeak and whelp and jump
And then start doin’ tricks
He knew what he was in for
My chili is the best
But whether I could stand him later
Would really be the test
After gulping down a big bowl
And smilin’ like a dog
A couple hours later
He was sent out with the hogs
I had a shot of Red Eye
And drank a couple beers
But I couldn’t eat another bowl
For the sake of my arrears
My dog came scratching at the door
And I thought it would be fine
To let him in the cabin
Cuz the smell he’d leave behind
I opened up the cabin door
And scratched him on the nose
And the whiff that came in with him
Did not smell like a rose
This only goes to show you folks
A dog is man’s best friend
But be careful with that chili
It will get you in the end.
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